EXPECTATIONS OF OTHERS
We often create very high expectations of others.
Why should we expect them to act or react according to a pattern which we idealized for them, and invariably get disappointed when they do not?
Can we conclude that it was their responsibility to meet our expectations and by not fulfilling that responsibility they are a disappointment to us?
Or, should we rather consider the possibility that we were under the illusion that this person or persons could complete us and make us happy, thus we created unrealistic expectations in relation to them?
Yes, that is more like it. This is a tendency inherent to us human beings, complex as we are, whenever we feel unfullfilled or unrealized as an individual or in fact any emotional emptiness, we actually turn outside for stimuli, often to those closest to us.
We start expecting others to fill the void in us, we expect them to be the answer to some vague emptiness within ourselves, to something which although we find difficult to define we nevertheless feel we need…
It is known nowadays that if we stop to think, to look within, we are likely to come closer to understanding what is missing from our lives, from ourselves, and what can we do to find that “missing” part. It is not that others are disappointing; rather, it is our void which leads us to create expectations, to fabricate illusions and disillusions.
The answer could be as simple as start doing some volunteer work, as it can be enrolling in dance classes, or going bungee jumping…who knows, there are endless possibilities. We are all different but deep down there is creativity and joy in all of us which needs to be expressed. The more we express it the closer we move towards equilibrium, well being, and the kind of plenitude that does not require much expectation or emotional dependence from others.
I leave this with you for now.
Love & Light